Stories

My Life At DESPO – Episode 73

The fresh air felt good while it caressed my skin as walked slowly, thinking about where to go.
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One mind said i should just go take one chilled bottle of Heneiken and pass time in lexuz bar..
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Another mind said i should goan check up on one babe that i was having a crush on in Meekest’s lodge.. The other mind was about suggesting different thing when my phone rang..
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” hello,”
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” good evening,” a female voice greeted from the other end.
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” good evening…..,” i replied trying to figure out who i the caller was.
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” i called to tell you that I’m free now, where you at?,” she replied, throwing me off balance with her reply cos i was yet to figure out who she was.
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” errmm, pls don’t be offended oh, who am i unto?,” i asked..
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” are you for real right now?,” she asked, giggling..
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I know it felt embarrassing one kine sha, but  I tried to let her know it was deliberate.. All i asked for was a clue and i would figure her out. She just smiled and hung up.
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One mind say make i bone the other mind say make i call back to know who dey yan.. I dialled her number, she  didn’t pick at first. I had to redial cos na me fuck up.
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She picked at the second ring, ” so you didn’t even saved my number after i gave it you earlier right,” she said, upon answering, sounding angry.
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” I’m sowie, abeg no vex,” i replied immediately i figured she was the one that i met in her department earlier..  You nor go blame me, the brain dey process many things dat period…
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“na man wey dey reason dey scratch bear-bear (beards),” na so Burna Boy talk am.
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I admitted that she had every right to get angry over what i did.
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” you’re even kind oh, if na me i for dun block  your number sef,” i teased and she jokingly threatened to block my number after the call. We later agreed to meet over the weekend before i hung up.
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I went to Meekest lodge. He and some of his lodge boys were gambling, playing whot.
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Meekest should be crowned king of gambling.. From rolling of dice,  schedule with nokia torch light, whot, ps2 and Merrybet, visual n co.. He dey run all of dem.  Watch out for the boy sha, he might own the biggest Casino in 9ja, someday.
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 I sat close to them and watched as they played on for some time.
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” why your eyes dey red na… Abi na because of the small 1k wey you dun loose nai make you wan con cry?,” Meekest asked.
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” which kine mumu talk be dat one na, you nor wise.. who tell you say i wan cry?,” Owos fired back at Meekest..
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” you nor wan cry, why water con dey gather for your eyes?,” Meekest added. His words drew our attention to Owos and upon observation, the boy eye dey red wella. Him dey hot seat..
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One funny thing about gambling is that, you tend to calculate all the good things you could’ve done with the money you’ve lost. Na dat kine thinking dey make dem dey get pepper eye.
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You better give a loser chance at those moments cos dem go transfer aggression to you ‘ free of charge’.
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Time check *** 07:20pm**
Dafe came inside the room and dived the bed. He pulled his shirt, brought some money from his pocket and announced he would join the next game.
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” Owos, nor be small tin your babe dey perform for church since oh.. she just dey fall anyhow dey roll for ground wen dem dey pray.
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As i see as she dey fall under the anointing, i con dey pity your life. Na once i forget about my own problem and start to dey pray for you o…. cos i know say your destiny go dun remain 1-bar,”  Dafe remarked and we all laughed out loud. (Dat kine wicked laugh)
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” Daflex your father!,” Owos cussed back, visibly angry.  ” why you go call her my babe, I dun gist her, before” he asked, dat moment the guy fit carry d room tey stone …
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See one thing about guys life ehn, e jus too sweet. There are some days when all your guys wee decide to just be yabbing you..
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On such days, if the odds are againts you and you nor get anybody to back you up or getpunchlines to defend yourself ehn, e dun be for you be dat… That evening was Owos’ roasting day, he was the center of yabbing dat night.
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Dafe joined the next game and lost some cash to Meekest and the other guys before power was restored, (up Nepa! ) **lol**
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” omo, dis game for finish before ona comot if not, ona go refund my money wey i dun lost since..” Meekest said (red eyes sumtin).
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“Blacky which kine dirty talk be dat wan na?,” Dafe fired back..
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” you dun chop my money finish, you wan come run abi, for where….. we die here oh,” Meekest replied, looking at the other players for back up.
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” ok, ona nor wan talk abi, make ona gimme my money, ona fit continue.. i nor wan play,” Meekest replied.. “
” Or make we vote, highest number go decide if the game go continue or not.. If you want make the game continue, raise your hand,” he quickly added.
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You see Meekest ehn, if gambling was Grammy award, the boy for dun carry com 9ja… Back to back! He knows all the rules n some tricks of the gamling.
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Na Meekest fit tell you say make ona “mark(bet)” money for first to drink water sachet of water finish, or first to eat hot eba finish..  He could bet with anything.
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One thing i like about him is that, he is a disciplined gambler.. If the money wen he carry go gamble finish, that’s end of the day’s trade for him.
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Unlike some gamblers that would borrow and use their phones/wristwatches to take loan to gamble..
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One guy dun use him better leather pam  tey collect loan for Gbokodo gambling center. He went home on barefoot that day. (Story for another day) Those ones na chronic n senseless gamblers.
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” Gambling is like a business venture, its against the rule to start gambling with borrowed money…” If you think say na lie, ask Professional gambler, Meekest..
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Meekest didn’t get any support from the rest guys for the game to continue, so they ended the game and everyone came outside.
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“Efe, come make we stroll, e get one matter wen i wan clear you,” Meekest said as he wore his face cap and locked his gate.
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” omo, e get one babe number wen i collect for my department today oh, she dun text me her lodge name sef, make we go block her na” Meekest said as we stepped outside his lodge..
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” bros, na when you go stop gambling sef,” i asked the jamb question that i already knew the answer to, in response..
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” kolo! Na question wey i ask you be dat?,” he fired at me while we laughed.
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” guy wetin we go chop dis night? Leave babe matter first.. na who belleful dey find woman,” i replied.
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” why you dey ask me wetin  we go chop, na me born you?,” he asked before he laughed out loud. See ehn, dat punchline touch my spinal cord. I was speechless for some seconds cos the word weak me! **Lol**
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“Shebi na you dey ask when i wan quit gambling just now? So even if i go buy food sef, you nor go chop for inside cos na gambling money i tey buy am..
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And as you nor be gambler so, you nor fit chop from my gambling money,” he  added while i was trying to recover fron the 1st word-punch.
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” Na me fuck up, nor be your fault,” i manage to reply while he laughed hard at me. ” i go do you back,” i added.  The funny circle of punchlines will  always continue as far my guys are concerned..
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“Make we go come first b4 we go think of wetin we chop,” he said after he had had his fill of laughter.
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” Your fada!,” i fired back..
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” my fada dey house, you fool!,” he replied, laughing.
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“Ehen, i just remember… your babe con dey disgrace us for Dallas yesterday night oh,” he said..
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“Nor be you dun dey craze so…. which babe be dat?,” i asked.. (curious mood activated)
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” na dat Bee frnd wey dey give you green light na, as we enta Dallas.. We first eat snacks oh. Wen e reach time for drink, i say make dem gimme my normal coke.. Azo order for Black bullet.. unto say he gats “wear” him babe dat night na.
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I nor know wetin dat Bee frnd n Bee dey talk oh, se con say she fit down 1 black bullet and nothing go sup…” he was saying when i interrupted.. “She wan kee herself? Na wa oh”
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” omo, after her raking dun too much ehn, nai we order 1 black bullet for her oh.. she nor even drink reach half sef before she manya.. dey talk anyhow, misbehave n vomit..,” he said and i laughed…
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Na carry we carry her go house las las, she jus dey sleep for motor dey talk anyhow…
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He called the babe while we strolled and after he hung up… ” she say she dey house oh, make we go na,” he said.
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” bros, only you for go first oh, she fit nor reason with you well if i follow you,” i told him cos when it comes to baes, 2 na company, 3 na crowd..( you know the matter abi) **winks**
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” minister of women affairs, keep your advice for your pocket.. come make we dey go, na my show.. nor dey gimme dat excuse unless e nor dey your mind to go,” he replied.
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” nor say i nor tell you sha… lets go there,” i said, and he stopped a bike.
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To be continued…
First to comment gets 1gb free subscription..
2nd and 3rd to comment gets airtime..  😁

11 Replies to “My Life At DESPO – Episode 73

  1. Owos, nor be small tin your babe dey perform for church since oh.. she just dey fall anyhow dey roll for ground wen dem dey pray.
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    As i see as she dey fall under the anointing, i con dey pity your life. Na once i forget about my own problem and start to dey pray for you o…. cos i know say your destiny go dun remain 1-bar,”😂😂😂
    That part got me😂

  2. Bro, I have been following this your story all the way from nairaland. I keep checking your blog for update. Try and make the update frequent.

    I gbadu for format and street life writing method. I would have been the first to comment but I refused to do so reason being that I don’t want it to look I was cajoled into commenting.

    Big up bro!

    Complements of the season.

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